By Rachel

I hosted my Kentucky Kitchen Table in my hometown of Bowling Green. I was lucky enough to manage to pull together a ragtag dinner group consisting of some distant cousins that I don’t remember being related to, an uncle, my dad, and the lawyer in charge of my grandads estate. Most of these poor souls just wanted to come to my grandparents house for a meeting and to sign some documents but had the misfortune of mentioning dinner and me deciding that my project was way more important than their ability to evacuate. We pulled together an oddly good meal consisting of ribs and chicken that where both of the farm fresh variety (slaughtered and put in a deep freeze till the grandkids forget it had a name) along with homemade cornbread, baked beans, and lemonade as a group (minus Pete who would rather watch football and left the kitchen). We decided to eat at the dining table in the sunroom surrounded by our prickly cacti friends and settled in for a good long meal.

The captives of the evening were my uncle Pete, my dad Paul, distant cousins Taylor, Terrah, and Graham (no that’s not a typo, my last name is Graham and his first name is Graham) and lawyer extraordinaire Tracy. While the group may not look that diverse on the outside we represent a wide demographic of ages, backgrounds, and belief systems. Pete who has lived a rough life and at 40 looks closer to 65 never went to college and now has seizures so he can no longer work on power lines like he used to so he’s been forced into retirement. My dad went to Western and then vet school and is now a veterinarian/farmer/archery coach. Taylor went to Louisville for college and now has a full time job there where she coordinates fundraisers. Graham was a professional archer from 18-23 but lost most his most of his vision in his dominant eye in a gun explosion and is now a welder. Terrah is a nurse and extremely religious (to the point she sent me a bible in the mail less than a week after this dinner/first meeting). Last but not least Tracy who has a law degree but decides to use it to do everything a lawyer does minus going into an actual courtroom and has 2 jack russell terriers that get stuck in groundhog holes.

As I started off the discussion I attempted to make it clear that this project is about insightful discussion and not starting brawls at the dinner table and thankfully everyone seemed to grasp the concept except for Pete who immediately started laughing about “those butthurt liberals” and immediately killed most of my hope for this to end with no hurt feeling and open minds. Once Pete got it together we started in on what citizenship means to each of us and we unsurprisingly ended up split up in our beliefs by age group with Taylor and I speaking more about being a part of a society who accepts you, Terrah and Graham talking more on their freedoms and their rights and how you are a citizen when your country let’s you be your own person while still protecting protects you and providing guidance almost like a parent would do, and Pete, Paul, and Tracy made their beliefs known that citizenship to them means feeling safe, loving your country and being willing to do anything in its name because it is your home. Luckily we all agreed on something, some people in the group brought up that no matter the background of a person, if they truly feel like an American and are only here with good intentions that they should be treated like citizens and not outcasts at least by the public. I was truly surprised that Pete agreed and I feel that he probably likes the idea of a utopian society but wouldn’t truly practice this due to the fact that I’ve heard one too many jokes about muslims come out of his mouth over the years but I guess he gets the benefit of the doubt for now.

After this I directed the conversation towards what kind of person everyone wants to be and what they do to try to become this ideal. All of the men ended up described their ideal way of being as being caring, friendly, useful people, and being able to protect their loved ones which reminded me of the paper we read on younger people not being able to really discuss morals because they were never taught any. This situation was kind of reversed from the article where I felt like the men weren’t taught how to truly express themselves but had words put in their mouths to spew out whenever they are told to. The guys had this preconceived notion of what a real man is from hearing it their whole lives and it was honestly disappointing to get such a generic answer. I do however feel that if any one of my younger male friends had been there he would have felt much more comfortable opening up. The ladies of the group however were not afraid to speak their minds and get into specifics. They brought to the table a collective desire to be able to give more of their time to their families and spend less time caught up in themselves. Terrah brought up her desire to be able to be there for everyone and that if anyone of her friends from church or otherwise ever needed anything at all that she could be there in a split second to do anything for them because not enough people take the time to care about others.

This lead into a discussion of religion and Terrah’s various mission trips. Out of all of us I was the only person who wasn’t a practicing christian which lead to a few overzealous minutes of preaching by Terrah but eventually managed to get turned back around to the relative zone of living better together. Everyone agreed that religion is a moral code and that not practicing one doesn’t make someone a bad person, it just means that they have to make their own limits and define good and bad for themselves. Graham brought up that community service is one of the best things a church does as it allows people to actually get together and make a difference and due to the sense of community and obligation to their group people tend to make more of an effort to help. Terrah brought up that the last 2 mission trips her church planned kept getting put off due to the snare of preparation and ended up happening 5 months after the originally scheduled dates. She shared that she;s not going on another trip as she believes they accomplished nothing because they brought shoes, toys, and toothpaste to an area that had way more pressing issues such as disease and how to get water than worrying about brushing their teeth. Taylor also brought up that on a mission trip that she went on where the kids got toothpaste that was mint flavored that the kids would end up eating the toothpaste like it’s candy and get ill because they had never seen it before. The article to hell with good intentions really hit home here and made me realize that the human race is basically just wandering around with its hands over its eyes convinced it is a gift from god bestowing greatness wherever it may go refusing to look at the reality that it’s poisoning everything it touches. After this the discussion took a quick turn to the official reason for everyone’s visit to Bowling Green and the discussion was promptly left at the table.

This project was surprisingly more comfortable than I had originally expected especially considering that half my group where stranger to me. After doing this project I have to believe that most people are inherently good and have good intentions but don’t necessarily know how to properly execute them. Since I know Pete as usually being very brash and his relatively cooperative and accepting attitude I must imagine that being taken out of your comfort zone and the preconceived notions of those closest to you gives you time to reflect and process what your beliefs as an individual are without the hive mind. This has also helped me realize how different we can be on the surface but the our souls share a like mind of love and acceptance.

By Erik

This fall, I had the pleasure of hosting my Kentucky Kitchen Table in my own dining room.  Since I have lived in Bowling Green, Kentucky my whole life, it was a convenient ten-minute drive from campus for me and John Mark, the cohost of the project.  Around the table (from left to right) was John Mark, a junior in the Honors College at WKU who is majoring in creative writing; DeAnn, John Mark’s mother, a very sweet woman who works as a physical therapist and is from Roanoke, Virginia; Rick R., my father, who works as a cognitive behavioral therapist, is infamous for his cheesy “dad jokes,” and is from Minnesota; Rick T., an accountant, history buff, and talker of all things politics who is from Carroll county and had lived in Franklin, Kentucky for many years; Kathy, my mother, who works as a marriage and family therapist, has the kindest of hearts, and is from Tennessee; and myself, a freshman in the Honors College at WKU who is majoring in chemistry and biology.

As the night began, we all gathered around the table and each enjoyed a big bowl of chili or two, making a few brief comments about my dogs who were loudly pleading for liberation from the bedroom in which they were locked in for the night.  Since the 2016 presidential election was earlier in the week, I knew political talk was inevitable, but I was excited to hear the various opinions that our guests had brought to the table, nevertheless.

Like most Kentucky Kitchen Table projects, we started out by discussing what it truly means to be a citizen, apart from voting and paying taxes.  The common response to this question was along the lines of how you should offer help to those who are in need, and how you should respectfully voice your opinions to the community when the opportunities arise.  In other words, you should be open to serving the community in hopes of making it a better place to live.  Connecting these ideas to the class, I presented the idea of how Thomas Jefferson highly valued town meetings because it was the healthiest way that the community could discuss societal issues.  After we explored many different answers, Rick T. posed his own question in response:  where has civility gone in today’s society?  His explanation to the question was composed of his experiences throughout his life, telling us about his noticing of society beginning to shift toward a lack of respect for one another’s opinions.  John Mark followed by talking about how people’s ideas are so polarized from each other, which oftentimes leads to people arguing with a closed mind, thus neglecting the idea of seeking a common ground to settle upon.

Switching the mood of the conversation, I asked those around the table what they thought some of the best things in today’s society were.  Those who were quick to answer listed off things such as technology, medicine, education, transportation, and the growth of capitalism and freedom.  DeAnn, reminiscing about old technology, asked me and John Mark if we happened to know about microfiches.   As we shook our heads no, DeAnn and Rick T. both took the opportunity to explain to us how troublesome it used to be to have to use a microfiche to research information for a school paper since all of your work had to be done at the library.  In contrast, the point was made about how our generation is fortunate enough to live in the age of technology, and how we are always roughly five clicks away from finding the answer to a myriad of questions online.  Being the philosopher that Rick T. is, he once again smoothly made his way into the conversation and posed another great question:  is the convenience of technology always a good thing?  We made the conclusion that in moderation, it is a good thing.  Rick R. talked about how thousands of years ago, people relied on each other for both safety and social interaction, and in contrast, people now just hunker down in the comfort of their home because technology and social media provides people with a sense of social connectedness.  This is one of the largest reasons that keeps us from getting to know our neighbors, and many of us are guilty of it.

Finally, with the election fresh on our minds, I posed the question, “what is some advice that you would give to the president-elect?”  A mutual agreement amongst everyone at the table was that the best piece of advice to is to tell him that the government is an institution, not a person.  This piece of advice would be good to tell the president-elect so that he may humble himself, and it is also a good piece of advice for those who are troubled by the thought of Mr. Trump in office.  Rick T. took this opportunity to access the perpetual history vault in his noggin to compare this situation to one seen earlier in American history: Ronald Reagan’s presidency.  Rick T. explained how Reagan was viewed as unfit for the presidency because he was a “stupid actor,” but went on to hold his own because of the smart individuals that he surrounded himself with in office – something that I think most of us hope Mr. Trump will do.  Also, one of the biggest revelations that occurred at the table was when Rick T. stated that he was a Blue Dog Democrat.  As a look of confusion emerged from many of our faces, Rick T. quickly explained that it was a term used for democrats who hold conservative views on many issues.  After Rick T. dropped this bomb on us, I personally began to question my stances on political issues and sift through the views that I can consider bipartisan.  As for DeAnn, she learned that her political views best matched up with Rick T.’s, considering herself a newly-found Blue Dog Democrat.

In closing, I came into this project expecting the night to be short, boring, and full of expected answers; however, I was shocked at how insightful and enjoyable the night turned out to be.  I am very thankful that I was required to complete this project, and I would absolutely do it again.  From the time I asked the first question of the night, to the time we cleaned up the dining room table, two, almost three hours had sped by.  Never in my life had I perceived the saying, “everyone has something to bring to the table,” as being so accurate.  If you ever have the chance to organize your own Kentucky Kitchen Table, I highly encourage you to, for you may walk away from the night with a different perspective on society, or maybe even discover that you are a Blue Dog Democrat, who knows…

By Megan

When I first heard about the Kentucky Kitchen Table I knew that I wanted to host a meal in my home, but as the meal got closer, I became very nervous and apprehensive to share my home and my parents with individuals that I barely knew. I was accompanied by five individuals from very different backgrounds with differing views. The first guest at my kitchen table was my roommate and close friend, Lyn Dawsyn, who grew up in Glasgow, Kentucky and is also a freshman in the Honors College. Lyn Dawsyn is typically quieter in group settings; however, when she did speak during our discussion, she always made insightful and profound statements. Her love for politics and unconditional compassion for others truly enriched our discussion. Next was Hannah whose experiences growing up in a larger city like Louisville, Kentucky and attending an all-girl private school allowed her to contribute numerous well-thought out and valuable insights to our discussion. Next was Scott who also grew up in Louisville, Kentucky and is very independent and firm in his beliefs, yet open to hearing the opinions and perspectives of others. Scott was the individual at the table who I knew the least. The final two individuals at my Kentucky Kitchen Table were my parents, David and Tami. David has lived in and around Bowling Green his entire life and currently works as an Engineering Specialist for Medical Center Health (formerly Commonwealth Health Corporation). David enjoys sharing stories about his countless experiences and lessons learned thus far. Although I thought I had heard every story he had to tell over the last eighteen years, my dad shared stories during our dinner about his time in the Army that I had never heard, which was perhaps one of my favorite parts about this project. The final person seated at my kitchen table, my mom Tami, undoubtedly put in more work than anyone else leading up to the meal, which truly exemplifies her unconditional selflessness. Tami is a Certified Credit Specialist who also works for Medical Center Health. She is much less outspoken compared to David but still contributed numerous valuable comments to our discussion.

After everyone had filled their plates with delicious home-cooked food, we began our discussion by going around the table and sharing our opinions on what makes us all citizens and our responsibilities as citizens beyond those you typically learn about in school (voting, taxes, etc.). I was pleasantly surprised that we came to the unanimous decision that above all else, being kind to others and doing your part to be a genuinely good person to the people around you was the best way to be a better citizen. If each one of us made it our responsibility to be a good person, the dynamics in our communities would change drastically.

The next topic that we discussed was whether or not our jobs play a role in bettering the community. Because only two of the six people had true occupations, the students at the table answered the question based on the careers that we hope to have someday. Each of the young adults seated at the table had driven intentions of making a small difference or change in the field that they hope to enter. Lyn Dawsyn wanted to change the nature of political campaigns and advertising as a whole while Hannah wanted to change the nature of the media and how news is portrayed. Scott and I both plan to enter healthcare fields, and we are both largely aware of the impact that each individual interaction that we have with a patient, especially a child, could change the way that they view healthcare professionals as well as improve their mood or how the rest of their day goes despite their illness or disability.  David and Tami also expressed genuine desires to treat everyone with compassion and respect in the workplace regardless of how they treat you, their position or title, or how bad of a day you are having. After dinner, Hannah and I both decided that this discussion in particular reminded us of one of the central questions we are focusing on in this course: How do we live well together? I also personally related the way that each of us answered this question to the fact that the first step in crossing the theoretical bridge from how we currently live to how we want to live better together is to recognize the part that every single individual holds in making a difference in how individuals in a community live together. If everyone was conscious of how they interacted with the people that they encounter, we could begin to live better together.

Relationships and interactions with our neighbors was the next topic that we discussed, and it was a particularly nostalgic subject for my parents and I as a majority of the neighbors that we had when I was growing up have recently moved away in the last few years. Nearly everyone at the table expressed the same sentiment that they felt much closer and had more interactions with their neighbors during childhood compared to now, which may be a result of the technology that we now fill our free time with. Tami pointed out that in addition to the advances in technology that have led to a reluctance in spending time outdoors and interacting with neighbors, a lack of trust and willingness to be vulnerable amongst strangers has also greatly contributed to a change in how we interact with our neighbors.

Because my Kentucky Kitchen Table took place the week before Election Day, and we had become seemingly comfortable with each other, our conversation then shifted to a more controversial topic: the impending election. To ease into the topic and not enter directly into discussing specific candidates, Hannah asked what advice each of us would give to someone running for a political office. My parents and I have had this conversation multiple times over the last few months, so immediately my dad mentioned how although it is a tricky (AKA wicked) problem, he wishes there was a way to require the President of the United States to have some form of military experience or background because he/she is given the task of being the Commander in Chief of the Armed Forces. This epistemological knowledge of how the armed forces operates would be valuable because the decisions made by the Commander in Chief impact the actual lives of millions of Americans more so than many other decisions that the President makes that may impact Americans’ livelihoods like taxes, healthcare, etc. I also stated that I feel the President should be business-minded rather than politically minded yet still be experienced enough to understand how to make decisions for an entire nation. I think a business-minded candidate is necessary because “corruption” is so prominent in politics and improving our economy and international relations are extremely important to the current state of our nation. Overall, everyone at the table agreed that although it was difficult to choose a candidate based on character in this election and one cannot base their vote solely on character, ideally a candidate for a political office would be level-headed, respectable, generally trustworthy, and considerate of all races, backgrounds, and economic classes while also being well-qualified for the position.

In summation, the greatest thing that I took away from my Kentucky Kitchen Table project was that our campus, hometowns, nation, and world do not necessarily need drastic and radical changes in order to improve. I left the dinner comforted by the thought that if each individual is willing to give compassion and strive to receive respect from everyone they come in contact with, numerous problems that we identified throughout the night could be resolved. I strongly believe that every individual sitting around my kitchen table that night greatly benefited from this project. My parents have not stopped talking about how much they enjoyed hosting this project in our home and how renewed their faith is in my generation. I have eaten dinner around the same table nearly every night for the last eighteen years, and I believe undoubtedly that the night of my Kentucky Kitchen Table project was possibly the greatest experience I have had sitting at that table.