By Tanner

I shared my Kentucky Kitchen Table experience with fellow students Rachel and Corinne on April 10, 2016.  A couple, whose names were Matthew and Anne, were gracious enough to invite us into their home, and allowed us to share a meal with them. None of us students had ever met Matthew or Anne before, who probably had no real reason to be especially excited about the evening ahead of them. It seems to me that having a dinner in your home, at your dinner table, invaded by three college students would not be the ideal way to relax after what must be the busiest day of the week in their household. Matthew is a pastor in Bowling Green, and this dinner happened to fall on a Sunday night. Upon meeting Matthew and Anne I could not help but notice the kindness that they share as a couple. They were not overly talkative, but Matthew especially had a dry sense of humor that kept the conversation lively, even when at first the conversation was mostly small talk. When we first arrived Anne was in the kitchen working hard on the meal we were about to enjoy. She volunteered to cook the entire meal herself and did not ask any of us to bring anything. This caused her to have to try and be in two places at once, hurrying from the living room to the kitchen, and back again as she simultaneously baked pie, cooked chicken, and got to know her guests.

As I said before, the other guests, besides me, were Corinne and Rachel, who are both our class Citizen and Self, though Rachel has the class at a different time than Corinne and I do. I knew Corinne very well before the night began. She was one of the first people I met when I arrived at WKU earlier this year. I knew that she would be just as social that night as she is all the time. She has a great personality, and is a good listener. I had never met Rachel before, but Corinne told me beforehand that she had had a biology class with her during the fall semester, and that she was very nice. When I did meet Rachel I could see that she was a little nervous, but she definitely opened up over the course of the evening. The biggest impression she left on me was her love for animals as she monopolized the attention of our host’s new puppy over the course of the evening.

We had probably been in Matthew and Anne’s home for about fifteen minutes when Matthew informed us that he was expecting one more guest. He informed us that an elder of another one of the local Presbyterian churches would be joining us for dinner. Matthew told us that her name was Thelma, and that she was an eighty-nine year old African-American women who was a big personality, and often introduced herself as Halle Berry. This description made me both nervous and excited. I had just begun to become comfortable in a stranger’s home, and now a new stranger was coming who was not even sure of their own identity. I had a feeling though that such a big personality would make the dinner more informative and entertaining.

Soon after Thelma arrived, I realized that my excitement and to some extent my nervousness were both warranted. One of the very first stories she told when she arrived was how she had gotten the opportunity to attend the inauguration of President Obama. The part of her story that really stood out to me was how she was very embarrassed during the event when a white man she was sitting next to wrapped her in his coat in an effort to make her more comfortable. What must have been to the gentleman a kind gesture extended to an elderly woman, was perceived by Thelma as a source of embarrassment. She said she was afraid how people watching the inauguration on television would perceive it. Here this was, a major event in the history of civil rights for African Americans, and she was being taken care of by a white man. She believed it clashed with the meaning of the event, which was that an African American was completely capable of leading the most powerful nation on earth.

No one else at the table, besides Thelma really spoke much over the course of the evening. This was not a bad thing though. You could tell that she loved the attention, and her stories were so vibrant because of her amazing memory that I was completely captivated by them. She spoke about what it was like growing up with an abusive stepfather. She told about her experience with racism. She apparently would be excluded from golfing scrambles because no one thought a black woman belonged in a country club. During these conversations everyone else at the table would get very quiet, but someone was always nodding in agreement as she talked. I think even Matthew and Anne were surprised by some of the stories that they may have never heard before.

These conversations really fit together well with the book “Citizen” that was discussed in the Citizen and Self seminars. She did not limit the conversation to just race. She dispelled some of my beliefs about what eighty-nine year olds are capable of when she told of how she still went in to schools for problem students to talk with them and be a role model. She also told about how she could make it to Louisville from Bowling Green in an hour. The fact that she still drove amazed me as did her memory and her sense of humor.

I am very grateful to Anne and Matthew for inviting me into their home and introducing me to Thelma. The discussions that we had at that table were so educational, and will be one of the first things I think about when I remember my freshman year at Western. In Citizen Self we read an article titled “Happiness” about what it really takes to be truly happy in life. I do not know what the answer is, but I think Thelma does, and I think everyone at that table had a lot to learn from someone who has overcome so much in life yet still has such a lively spirit in her twilight years.

By Trevor

My Kentucky Kitchen Table project took place in my own home in Bowling Green, Kentucky. My parents insisted on cooking the entire meal for our guests. My parents were super excited to have people over for dinner because we don’t often do. I invited a couple of my friends, our neighbors, and the majority of our other guests were friends and colleagues of my mom. First, we have my friends Conner, Abby, and Shelby. I’ve known each of them for many years, and we’ve went to many of the same schools. Now, Shelby lives in Nashville and attends Belmont, Abby attends SKYCTC, and Conner goes to WKU with me. Next, we have my neighbors Vickie and Brian. My mom’s friend and coworker Stephanie joined us, and she brought her son Corey. I had never met them before, but she is really good friends with my mom. Corey ate with my little brothers and sister, but they aren’t pictured in the photo. My parents not only cooked, but ate with us and contributed a lot to the conversation.

To start things off, we went around and told each other where we worked and what we did, and each of us answered the question about how each of our jobs relate to our roles as citizens. It just so happened that my mom, Stephanie, and Vickie all work at the hospital, but they all work in different departments and do different things. They all talked about how they feel that their jobs relate to their roles as citizens because they help other citizens in times of need such as when they are sick or are having a baby. Abby talked about how she keeps score for many kids’ sports teams in our community, which makes it possible for them to get out and play with each other. Conner works at a vets office. She absolutely loves it. She hopes to one day be a vet, and she is currently working as a kennel worker gaining knowledge and experience. My dad teaches architecture and drafting at the tech school in Russellville. Brian works at the Kobe aluminum plant, and Shelby thought that was quite interesting because her dad works at Logan aluminum. When we asked Brian what he did at Kobe, he said “I run a daycare… no actually, I manage a group of 6 or 7 people, but it often feels like I’m running a daycare.”

The conversation soon shifted to us discussing the reasons why we enjoy living where we do. Having came from small towns such as Tompkinsville and Scottsville, Vickie, Brian, my mom, and my dad all agreed that the reason they moved to Bowling Green was because there are many more job opportunities here and “there is everything you would ever need here,” said Vickie. Vickie also said she loves Bowling Green because it is a big enough city, but still small enough to have that hometown feel without a lot of traffic. Shelby made a lot of good points when she talked about how there isn’t a lot of crime in Bowling Green compared to other cities such as Nashville where she lives now. She said she also liked living in Bowling Green because the sales tax is lower in Kentucky. During this discussion, Abby finally realized why her McDonald’s Sweet tea was $1.06 in Kentucky but $1.10 or $1.09 in other states like Tennessee. Her mind was blown. It was hilarious. We all came to the conclusion that the cost of living is a lot lower in Bowling Green and most parts of Kentucky compared to other places in the United States. My dad talked about how blessed he feels that he is living in the United States. He talked about how grateful he is that he can have as many kids as he wants, and choose his occupation, and just other simple freedoms that we often take for granted and others in the world don’t have.

My family has always sat at the dinner table each and every time we ate dinner at home. It is something that I have actually always enjoyed, even as a kid. For this reason, I was interested in finding out if other families in Bowling Green did this as well. Abby told us that her family usually eats in the living room but they are usually still all together and watching a sports game. Both Vickie and my mom talked about how when they were younger they sat at the dinner table. When they got married, they usually ate wherever, but once they had kids, they made it a New Year’s Resolution one year to eat dinner each night as a family at the table, and it just kind of stuck, and it has been that way ever since. Brian said that as a child, his family ate dinner in different locations in the house, but now that his family sits at the table each night, he really enjoys it a lot more. He talked about how it was really the only time to actually be able to catch his kids and talk to them since all their schedules were so different.

As everyone started to finish their dinner, we decided to discuss the final question of what does citizenship mean to you. Conner and Abby’s responses were simple yet important. They said that they believed it to just being a part of the community, caring for others, and doing your part. Shelby talked about how she felt it was “being responsible for yourself as well as others in the community.” “It’s a whole system and we all have to contribute to make it work.” Finally, my dad made some good points when he related to himself. He talked about how citizenship is being a part of something bigger than what you could accomplish on your own. “I can’t build a road from here to Russellville to get to work and teach students, but I pay taxes so others will build the road for me. Now, I can get to work in order to make money to provide for my family while the construction workers were also making money to provide for theirs.”

Conversations like these are actually not uncommon in my family. Sometimes we talk about some pretty serious things, especially when it comes to the news and what’s going on all over the world. However, it was interesting to get some new people’s opinions on some very important topics.

By Brittney

My partner, Callie, and I went to Mike and Carly’s house (because of scheduling changes, Callie’s friend was unable to come). They are my aunt and uncle, but I thought it would be neat to have a discussion with them, because they are extremely religious. Mike works at CGS Machine and Tool and is a WKU grad. Carly is an artist who owned a business with another painter and recently opened a store in downtown Franklin. They have four kids, three of which are home-schooled. James is 19, works at Southern Kentucky Granite, and loves working on trucks. Jon is 17, works at Chick Fil A, and is being called into ministry. Anna is 16, loves to bake, especially pies, and will graduate high school early. All three love playing basketball. Olivia is 14 and is artistic like her mom. Callie and I sit across from each other in class and didn’t know anything about each other. She is a senior and will take a year off before medical school because she aspires to be a physician. She has multiple jobs and is “just trying to figure out life.” She is not religious, describing herself most likely as agnostic, so we were able to get different points of view during the discussion.

Carly insisted on fixing nachos for dinner, which we finished before taking the pictures. After eating, we started the discussion by asking the first question (What does citizenship mean?) and saw where the conversation went. Each person’s view came out in his or her answer. Mike said it meant responsibility to your community and country and “sharing history and working to change laws to improve the community.” Mike’s dad and brother served in the military so he believes we have to protect and exercise our rights and share that history. As an educator and active community member, Carly said, “teaching and participation.”  Callie said it is “fostering the community you want to live in,” which makes sense because she has different jobs like the manager of a water park who trains lifeguards who care for the public’s safety. We then discussed how to create the communities we want. Anna said she creates her community by helping her elderly neighbors with daily tasks. We all agreed that helping people is important and helps create the communities we want, and it takes all people with all abilities. Each member of the family has different abilities. Some are athletic, some are fixer-uppers, some are cooks, and some are great with technology, and each person tries to utilize his or her talents. Callie wants to use her skills and dedicate her life to helping people in the medical field and I want to help students by being a high school teacher.

As we discussed helping others, I brought up the video we watched in class of the girl being run over. I asked if we have an obligation to help others. Callie believes people are fundamentally selfish and must overcome that instinct. We should help people but we do not have any actual obligation, and I agree with her view. However, as a Christian, I understand Jesus expects us to help others. My family spoke strongly with the belief that we do have an obligation. Jon said it is a conviction and James said “If a person can ask for help, help him. If he cannot ask for help, definitely help him.” Anna said that they have been blessed so it is their job to pass on the blessing.

We continued discussing ways to help others in their neighborhood and workplaces. It reminded me of the recent reading “The Energy Diet.” Andrew Postman takes small steps to reduce his family’s harm to the environment. His small changes added up and led to a few other small changes. I believe that my cousins take small steps each day to share their faith and better their community, and I think those actions encourage others to take small steps, too. Jon mentioned how he can be the difference in a customer’s day and while at work, he tries to take initiative and do what needs to be done. Mike discussed how he must monitor his actions and reactions as a supervisor. He must show respect and keep his emotions in check. James said he follows his motto, “Do the best you can, because that helps the community. Callie discussed her jobs both at the water park and in the Communication Department. She monitors her words and actions, too. I’m a student but I try to help my friends, peers, and others on my residence hall floor.

I asked the question “Does your religious identity relate to your role as citizen in any way you haven’t mentioned?” in order to hear their specific thoughts, because I could hear their faith in all their answers. Jon said, “If you believe something, you shouldn’t have to say it. It should come through your words and deeds.” And it sure did. That is why they focus so intensely on helping others. It reminded me of the early reading “If It Feels Right.” Young adults were asked about morals and right versus wrong, and responded that it is an individual decision. Everyone has different views, experiences, and beliefs, so it is up to each person to decide. My cousins are a different story, though. They are firm in their beliefs, which is admirable, but can come across as judgmental. They typically believe there is a right and wrong, so I wonder how they would operate in situations with gray areas.

My family said they usually have in depth discussions about tricky subjects like this, so it was not unusual for them, but it was fun. I enjoyed listening to their opinions which I typically don’t hear and learning more about them. I also enjoyed getting to know Callie more and hearing her views. I thought this was an enjoyable activity and hopefully I can create conversations like this with my immediate family, friends, and neighbors at home.