Kentucky Kitchen Table: A Night With New Friends

By Hunter

My name is Hunter and I will be describing my Kentucky Kitchen Table experience! Originally, I planned on having my table with my close family, however, this did not work out and so I was able to be connected with a table here in Bowling Green. This Kentucky Kitchen Table was kindly hosted by Molly and David at their home in Bowling Green . Along with David and Molly, the table consisted of Brady, Josie, Samantha, Caitlin and I.

There was a great deal of diversity among our table in terms of age and background. David is an English associate professor and teaches courses ranging from introduction to literature to creative writing. He is also an accomplished writer and has published several novels. He stated that he always keeps a pen at his side in case an idea for a project comes to mind. David has a great sense of humor and was able to keep the conversation going when things were a little awkward towards the beginning of the dinner. Molly used to be an instructor and advisor for creative writing majors and minors at a university, but now mainly focuses on her writing and has also published several novels. She is an extremely talented cook and made Mexican style lasagna with beans and rice, which everyone thought was phenomenal! Brady, Josie, and I all attend Western Kentucky University. Brady is majoring in entrepreneurship with a minor in theatre and is from Paducah, Kentucky. He lives in Minton Hall and loves to snowboard whenever he gets the chance. Josie is currently a freshman majoring in communication disorders and is from Marietta, Georgia. She just happened to fall in love with WKU after quickly touring it on her way to a visit at another college where she was offered an athletic scholarship. She currently lives on one of the top floors in Pearce Ford Tower and loves the view at dusk and dawn. Josie brought in wonderful homemade cookies to share with everyone! I am a junior and biochemistry major from Mercer, Kentucky. I live on the edge of campus and love walking to Snell Hall to work in an organic chemistry lab. I contributed to the dinner by bringing cookies and beverages. Both Samantha and Caitlin are still in high school. Samantha is a senior at a Bowling Green high school and is a close friend of Molly and David. She was described as being like their adopted daughter. She plans on going to college in Washington D.C. Caitlin attends a high school in Washington D.C. and was staying with Molly and David during her visit to Kentucky. She is considering attending WKU and had many questions about campus life for Brady, Josie and I.

Our conversation began by Brady, Josie and I describing to Caitlin a little about our backgrounds and what we loved about Western Kentucky University. We all agreed that we love hiking around campus and that it is easy to quickly walk to any of the lecture buildings, even though the hill can be exhausting. Molly also mentioned how beautiful she thinks WKU is and how great the view is from the top of campus. As the conversation progressed, we started conversing about our thoughts and experiences on the party scene at WKU. Even though Brady, Josie and I all agreed that it is very prevalent at WKU (even in the honors dorms), we all stated that it was something we tried to avoid but that we still saw it as tempting. This conversation made me think about the Paying for the Party book we have read for class. Based on our backgrounds, it appeared to me that Brady, Josie and I all fall into the “cultivated for success” category. We all come from middle class families where our parents have encouraged us to pursue lucrative careers. We all may work occasionally but still have time to make friends and to be involved on campus. This topic also made me reflect on one of the central questions we are exploring in this class, “How can we live well together?” Unlike Brady, Josie and I, low-income students are not being provided the same opportunities that we are and are having lonely college experiences. While we were having this wonderful meal provided by Molly and David, many other students were going to be working late into the night to pay for their college debts. Considering the amount of time I personally spend on homework, I see no way that any student working this much could sanely stay enrolled. It was also mentioned by Molly that almost all the Gatton Academy students she has ever instructed were highly successful in her courses. Maybe this is true because they fall into the cultivated for success category, but are restricted by the academy from being involved in the party scene.

Finally, the question of what citizenship means was brought up. Originally, Brady, Josie and I were going to record the conversation but decided the conversation would flow more naturally if we didn’t. David believed that citizenship means doing what you can for your community. He thought that it doesn’t necessarily matter what way you contribute, as long as you are giving what you can. For example, he believed that a rich business man giving large donations to charity is equally as important as a less wealthy individual volunteering at a charity. Or if a single mom can’t contribute wealth or time, then doing her best to raise her kids to be affable adults is sufficient. David’s statement about the single mother called to my mind the central question of our class, “How do we solve shared problems?” Even if someone doesn’t have the resources or time to become an involved member in their community, they can still help solve problems by simply trying to better themselves and their families. This statement also made me think of the article “Why Bother?” by Michael Pollan. Even though the mother may not be directly benefiting the community, she is still setting an example to other mothers and is achieving a sense of self fulfillment. Molly was in complete agreement with David’s description of citizenship and added on that as citizens we should campaign for the things we are passionate about. She also mentioned the importance of forming relationships with those in the community and helping neighbors in their times of need.

Overall, I believe the most important thing I learned from this dinner is the importance of reaching out to people in our community and forming new relationships. I think the best way we can live well together is by communicating and bonding with those around us. Molly described at one point in the dinner how she had reached out to a neighbor when they were in a time of need. Without her relationship with this neighbor, Molly would have had no clue that this person needed assistance. Relationships are not only important for helping others through tough situations but are also imperative for achieving happiness in our own lives. As mentioned in the “What Makes Us Happy?” article in The Atlantic. During an interview Vaillant, the lead researcher for the study, stated that  he found that the only thing that is important in life is forming relationships. In today’s world, it seems like most people associate happiness with success and neglect to form these relationships. As described in “The Snare of Preparation,” by Jane Addams, we often spend too much time preparing and too little time acting. If we are constantly preparing, then we will never have time to form relationships and to achieve happiness in our lives. Another thing I learned from this experience is that even though someone may not be appearing to help society in any way, they may be doing what that can to help themselves which is enough. Citizenship is about what you can do to make the world a better place to live in, not about keeping a time sheet of how much time you volunteer or how much money you give.

I am very glad that I ended up having my Kentucky Kitchen Table with Molly, David, Josie, Brady, Samantha and Caitlin! If I had done my KKT with my family, I would have not met these wonderful people! Before the dinner, I was skeptical and was expecting the experience to be a waste of my time. Luckily, I was wrong and thought the experience was very beneficial because it effectively portrayed to me how others from different backgrounds view citizenship. I would like to thank Molly and David for hosting our table. They were extremely cordial and provided us with a wonderful meal. To other students who will be conducting their Kentucky Kitchen Tables in the future, I would recommend trying to find a table with members of your community you don’t know very well. It’s a little stressful at first sitting around a table with complete strangers, however, after everyone begins to talk it becomes an enlightening experience. In the future, I’d love to take part in other Kentucky Kitchen Tables to meet more people from my community and to form new relationships!

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